Wednesday, July 14, 2004

How I came to be part of the Brady Bunch

Hiya :) My name is Dawn. I grew up in New Mexico (mostly) and then moved away to join the Navy, get married a couple of times, have kids, see a ton of the world and learn more than I expected to learn from hardships. If I learned anything it is to enjoy life and your own company. I came back to Albuquerque and the family that lives here after almost 17 years of being away in 1997. A divorce and some pretty rough times had my two boys, Logan (almost nine at the time) and David (just about two years old) had to learn to start again. There were many big bumps, but we grew very close, very tough, and very independant.

I am a very outgoing personality. I am a woman capable of supporting herself and her family, and I found I loved the role of single mom. When I came to Albuquerque I worked my way through several jobs, started payments on a mobile home, and focused being a good mom. I settled into the life of relative obscurity in a mobile home park, and found ways to make ends meet, to be both mom and dad, and to convince myself that that liking my lifestyle and being satisfied with who I am was the same thing as not being lonely.

I knew I didn't need to be married to be happy. But I forgot what it was like to have a true friend in my life.

And then came my prince charming....
Work and parenting, when you are single, can leave you little time to get out and have much of a life of your own. It is easy to under-estimate the importance of adult company when you've been away from it for awhile.

In the summer of 2003 my sister and a few friends began to coax me out on an occasional weekend to go dancing, go to the lake now and again, to try and date a little more. I met a lot of guys, many of them very nice. But nothing clicked. My nights out went from once in awhile to rarely. School started back again, and my free time diminished dramatically. Halloween was approaching (one of my favorite events) and I began planning our costumes. Ah. Life is good. I love my children soooo much. I didn't regret anything.

Then one evening my kids went to spend the night at Grammies house and I had too much free time on my hands. I decided to go down the street to a Tavern I had been to very few times, and never alone. I figured I'd relax for a bit then go home and watch a movie on TV. Somehow I got into this conversation with a waitress, and before I knew it a bunch of us were taling as if we'd been lifelong friends. Suddenly I noticed a guy standing nearby, not taling, just kinda watching and listening. Oh Lawdy, was he handsome! I would have had some hope, but he was wayyyyy out of my league. I noticed he has a shirt on that meant he worked at the Tavern. I watched him all night, doing that deep-wishful-sigh-thing that we sometimes do when it's hopeless. One of the waitresses (Tracy... awesome girl) and I ended up hanging out that night and I disclosed my sudden crush, and (yes, I admit it) infatuation with this hunk of a man that I knew was beyond my means. Tracy let me in on a secret... that tall handsome fellow I'd been drooling over had been eyeing me as well.

It's a long story from there... and it involves me waiintg for hours on end until 4 am to go on dates for coffee with him when the bar closed. Our first real dates, (movie and dinner) included our kids... my two boys and his two boys and one girl. After three weeks I begged him to drive to Mississippi with me to meet my dad. He went. When we got back it was another two weeks before he asked us to move in with him. We did. (Yeah, I know how that sounds.) We spent our first Thanksgiving together in the same home, less than five weeks after we met. That was over almost two years ago and I am more in love today than I have ever been in my life. He's a great guy. We've got awesome kids. We are a good team, all of us together. Sometimes life throws ya curve balls....

And sometimes you hit the ball and get a home run.

Saturday, July 10, 2004

Photos from the forth



Wow, the last couple of days we've had rain. Not a lot of news for some places, but it is here. There is a local joke that says "YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM NEW MEXICO IF: it starts to rain and you stop to stare." :)

I have always loved rain here in the Land of Enchantment. You can smell rain long before it arrives. It is this amazing fresh scent that lingers in the air, a promise of things to come. Of course, where we live rain means mud, and mud means difficulty driving down the roads. But it is very worth it. The wild sunflowers are preparing to blossom. The kids worked all last weekend mowing and pulling and cleaning the property, and it is almost looking pretty good these days.

Mitchel worked on mowing the most, he is the one we can usually count on to be the most helpful around the house. He is the middle kid so he is in a state of constant in between. He is between being a teenager and a kid. Logan and Keri are about the same age, and so is David and Patrick, so Mitchel is between the two groups of kids and doesn't hang easily with either set. He is struggling between wanting to be adult and responsible, and wanting to be a boy and have fun. He has so many choices to make, and naturally he becomes a handful at times. As frustrating as it can be it is great to watch him grow and imagine what kind of adult he might become.

Keri is still sick, and has been a recluse in her room most of the time. She's been working a little here and there trying to prepare for Aude, her visitor from France. Aude arrives July 9th. Keri wanted a job this summer but has decided to wait so she can spend quality time with her guest. Keri is less in between and more on the cusp. She will be getting her drivers license soon. (what we call a provisional here, it lets her drive without an adult, but with restrictions.) She will be celebrating her 16th birthday this July, and is at that frightening stage where she looks like she's eighteen and as a parent you desperately want her to be 7 again. Keri is also this great mix of sophistication and hard driving athlete. She participates in school sports and ROTC in school, and took a medal on the rifle team this year. She is the first ROTC student to ever be awarded this medal by the American Legion. :) As a veteran I was so proud, as a parent I practically grinned myself to death when they presented it to her.

Logan has been helping off and on during the day, he is the kid with the drivers license and a car right now, and he is the gofer, the sitter, and the errand boy more often than not. He leaves Monday morning for the national AAU Tae kwon do championships in Florida. He is hard to describe. He's funny (the Jim Carey kind of funny that catches you by surprise) he's deeply introspective, he wants the world, and doesn't have the organization skills or the motivation to do most of what he needs to do to get where he wants to go. He is so bright I am sometimes afraid of the day when I can't keep up with him in a conversation. He's been my best friend since he was about four. :)

Patrick is cool. He used to drive me bananas, I woulda swore he wanted to be a lawyer for all the arguing he did, just for the sake of it. I think that for awhile he and I were at battle lines with one another. These days Pat is easy going, quick to help, fast to flash a smile, thoughtful, and usually one of the few that cause problems. He is definitely a young man. He strangely reminds me of Woody Haroldson.

David is the youngest. He has the misfortune to be held to the same standards as the older kids, who didn't have to do the same chores at his age, but he has the luck to be allowed more privileges than we let the same kids have at his age. (Like staying up later and making some of the choices he can make.) David wants to be funny, but has a sense of humor that often gets him in fights at school. He doesn't know what "back down" means, so he almost always ends up being the one to get called in the office for pummeling some kid, even kids four and five years older than him. Other than that, he is affectionate, and he's the one I can count on for true hugs and kisses, and someone to snuggle with for Saturday night movies on the couch.Brian and I are a story for another day. :)

So, it's Wednesday, and hump day as it goes. One more day and Yann gets here, Logan's French visitor who will stay with Logan at my sister Kimberly's home. Kimberly is the hardest working person I know, and a single Mom of the cutest most active little girl in the southwest. She is very brave to be taking on two teenage boys. :)

Possible rain for the weekend... cross your fingers!

Whoopie! It's Friday! ::Does a little dance:: The weekend has come and it's family time. Family time at our house often means house and yard work. Seven people can make an awful mess and weekends we play catch-up. Plus, with guests coming we are trying to make it tip top. I bought this cheesy cheap little pool for the kids to play in, perhaps the dogs as well if that's how it works out. It's all of eight feet wide and 18" deep, so it is more of a cooling area than a swimming hole. But water is water around here.

Logan and Keri have a car wash tomorrow, both of the are in ROTC in High school and the fund raisers have already started. The rest of 'em will probably hang with us for most the day. Maybe we'll get some time for a hike in the mountains, or a paintball fight.





Thursday, July 01, 2004

Rain

Wow, the last couple of days we've had rain. Not a lot of news for some places, but it is here. There is a local joke that says "YOU KNOW YOU'RE FROM NEW MEXICO IF: it starts to rain and you stop to stare." :)

I have always loved rain here in the Land of Enchantment. You can smell rain long before it arrives. It is this amazing fresh scent that lingers in the air, a promise of things to come. Of course, where we live rain means mud, and mud means difficulty driving down the roads. But it is very worth it. The wild sunflowers are preparing to blossom. The kids worked all last weekend mowing and pulling and cleaning the property, and it is almost looking pretty good these days.

Mitchel worked on mowing the most, he is the one we can usually count on to be the most helpful around the house. He is the middle kid so he is in a state of constant in between. He is between being a teenager and a kid. Logan and Keri are about the same age, and so is David and Patrick, so Mitchel is between the two groups of kids and doesn't hang easily with either set. He is struggling between wanting to be adult and responsible, and wanting to be a boy and have fun. He has so many choices to make, and naturally he becomes a handful at times. As frustrating as it can be it is great to watch him grow and imagine what kind of adult he might become.

Keri is still sick, and has been a recluse in her room most of the time. She's been working a little here and there trying to prepare for Aude, her visitor from France. Aude arrives July 9th. Keri wanted a job this summer but has decided to wait so she can spend quality time with her guest. Keri is less in between and more on the cusp. She will be getting her drivers license soon. (what we call a provisional here, it lets her drive without an adult, but with restrictions.) She will be celebrating her 16th birthday this July, and is at that frightening stage where she looks like she's eighteen and as a parent you desperately want her to be 7 again. Keri is also this great mix of sophistication and hard driving athlete. She participates in school sports and ROTC in school, and took a medal on the rifle team this year. She is the first ROTC student to ever be awarded this medal by the American Legion. :) As a veteran I was so proud, as a parent I practically grinned myself to death when they presented it to her.

Logan has been helping off and on during the day, he is the kid with the drivers license and a car right now, and he is the gofer, the sitter, and the errand boy more often than not. He leaves Monday morning for the national AAU Tae kwon do championships in Florida. He is hard to describe. He's funny (the Jim Carey kind of funny that catches you by surprise) he's deeply introspective, he wants the world, and doesn't have the organization skills or the motivation to do most of what he needs to do to get where he wants to go. He is so bright I am sometimes afraid of the day when I can't keep up with him in a conversation. He's been my best friend since he was about four. :)

Patrick is cool. He used to drive me bananas, I woulda swore he wanted to be a lawyer for all the arguing he did, just for the sake of it. I think that for awhile he and I were at battle lines with one another. These days Pat is easy going, quick to help, fast to flash a smile, thoughtful, and usually one of the few that cause problems. He is definitely a young man. He strangely reminds me of Woody Haroldson.

David is the youngest. He has the misfortune to be held to the same standards as the older kids, who didn't have to do the same chores at his age, but he has the luck to be allowed more privileges than we let the same kids have at his age. (Like staying up later and making some of the choices he can make.) David wants to be funny, but has a sense of humor that often gets him in fights at school. He doesn't know what "back down" means, so he almost always ends up being the one to get called in the office for pummeling some kid, even kids four and five years older than him. Other than that, he is affectionate, and he's the one I can count on for true hugs and kisses, and someone to snuggle with for Saturday night movies on the couch.Brian and I are a story for another day. :)

So, it's Wednesday, and hump day as it goes. One more day and Yann gets here, Logan's French visitor who will stay with Logan at my sister Kimberly's home. Kimberly is the hardest working person I know, and a single Mom of the cutest most active little girl in the southwest. She is very brave to be taking on two teenage boys. :)

Possible rain for the weekend... cross your fingers!

Whoopie! It's Friday! ::Does a little dance:: The weekend has come and it's family time. Family time at our house often means house and yard work. Seven people can make an awful mess and weekends we play catch-up. Plus, with guests coming we are trying to make it tip top. I bought this cheesy cheap little pool for the kids to play in, perhaps the dogs as well if that's how it works out. It's all of eight feet wide and 18" deep, so it is more of a cooling area than a swimming hole. But water is water around here.

Logan and Keri have a car wash tomorrow, both of the are in ROTC in High school and the fund raisers have already started. The rest of 'em will probably hang with us for most the day. Maybe we'll get some time for a hike in the mountains, or a paintball fight.